Compiled News 06-06 thru 13-06
In sickness and in health, The Sheep returns, talking to the silent masses and filling them with news they can get anywhere else.
WORST DIRECTOR EVER, UWE BOLL, WANTS TO FIGHT TALENTED DIRECTOR, QUENTIN TARANTINO. SERIOUSLY. OH, AND BUY TAKING A SHOT AT UWE, DOES THAT MEAN WE AT THE SHEEP GET TO BOX HIS ASS, TOO? 'CAUSE THAT WOULD BE SWEEEET!
WILL "SPIDER-MAN 3" BE IN 3-D FOR IMAX?!? WHO CARES!?! JUST GIMMIE IT!
FROM THE VAULT OF SHITTIEST IDEAS EVER, EMINEM TO STAR IN UPDATED FILM VERSION OF "HAVE GUN, WILL TRAVEL".
FINCHER'S "ZODIAC" MOVES TO JANUARY 2007. GOOD THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO WAIT.
JOHN CLEESE TO WRITE BOOK ABOUT THE HISTORY OF COMEDY, BECAUSE HE'S BETTER AT IT THAN YOU WILL EVER HOPE TO BE.
BRYAN SINGER MADE A BUNCH OF CUTS TO "SUPERMAN RETURNS"...OR, AS WE LIKE TO CALL IT, HAS GUARANTEED 12 DIFFERENT DVD VERSIONS FOR THE NERDS TO BUY.
ANTHONY MICHAEL HALL IS PROUD OF HIS 80'S MOVIES. JUST LIKE ANYONE WITH HALF A BRAIN WOULD BE PROUD OF THE MOVIES THAT MADE HIM OR HER RIDICULOUSLY FRICKIN' FAMOUS.
EVER WONDER IF HOLLYWOOD PORTRAYS HACKERS CORRECTLY? NO? WE DIDN'T EITHER, BUT SOMEBODY ASKED THE COPS ANYWAY.
PROVING THAT WILLIE NELSON WILL DO ANYTHING TO FEED HIS WEED HABIT, HERE'S THE LOWDOWN ON THE DIRECT-TO-DVD "DUKES OF HAZZARD" PREQUEL YOU WERE SO WORRIED ABOUT.
EMPEROR LUCAS WANTS SEAN CONNERY FOR "INDY 4"....WHATEVER LUUUUUUUCAS WANTS.....LUUUUUUCAS GEEEETS....
TIM BURTON TO DIRECT FILM VERSION OF "SWEENEY TODD", FORGET ABOUT JIM CARREY.
JANET JACKSON, ONE OF THE LESS-CRAZY JACKSONS, HAS A NEW ALBUM COMING OUT IN SEPTEMBER. HOWEVER, IF IT DOESN'T HAVE A SEQUEL TO "BLACK CAT" ON IT, OR ANOTHER NIPPLE-SLIP, WE'RE NOT SURE WE CARE.
DANNY ELFMAN TAKES HIS NAME OFF OF "NACHO LIBRE", CONTINUES FIGHTING WITH EVERY DIRECTOR HE WORKS WITH.
CRAZY-PYSCHO-IDIOT ANN COULTER TO SQUARE OFF WITH OUT-OF-DATE, STILL MILDLY ENTERTAINING FOUL-MOUTHED COMEDIAN GEORGE CARLIN ON THE "TONIGHT SHOW" WEDNESDAY, JUNE 14TH. SOMEWHERE JOHNNY CARSON IS CRYING. OH, AND KT TUNSTAL IS THE MUSICAL GUEST.
That's it. See, you haven't missed anything.
Get well soon, Big Ben. And where a F'N helmet.
-Constable Kreegal
Big Boss of The Sheep
WORST DIRECTOR EVER, UWE BOLL, WANTS TO FIGHT TALENTED DIRECTOR, QUENTIN TARANTINO. SERIOUSLY. OH, AND BUY TAKING A SHOT AT UWE, DOES THAT MEAN WE AT THE SHEEP GET TO BOX HIS ASS, TOO? 'CAUSE THAT WOULD BE SWEEEET!
WILL "SPIDER-MAN 3" BE IN 3-D FOR IMAX?!? WHO CARES!?! JUST GIMMIE IT!
FROM THE VAULT OF SHITTIEST IDEAS EVER, EMINEM TO STAR IN UPDATED FILM VERSION OF "HAVE GUN, WILL TRAVEL".
FINCHER'S "ZODIAC" MOVES TO JANUARY 2007. GOOD THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO WAIT.
JOHN CLEESE TO WRITE BOOK ABOUT THE HISTORY OF COMEDY, BECAUSE HE'S BETTER AT IT THAN YOU WILL EVER HOPE TO BE.
BRYAN SINGER MADE A BUNCH OF CUTS TO "SUPERMAN RETURNS"...OR, AS WE LIKE TO CALL IT, HAS GUARANTEED 12 DIFFERENT DVD VERSIONS FOR THE NERDS TO BUY.
ANTHONY MICHAEL HALL IS PROUD OF HIS 80'S MOVIES. JUST LIKE ANYONE WITH HALF A BRAIN WOULD BE PROUD OF THE MOVIES THAT MADE HIM OR HER RIDICULOUSLY FRICKIN' FAMOUS.
EVER WONDER IF HOLLYWOOD PORTRAYS HACKERS CORRECTLY? NO? WE DIDN'T EITHER, BUT SOMEBODY ASKED THE COPS ANYWAY.
PROVING THAT WILLIE NELSON WILL DO ANYTHING TO FEED HIS WEED HABIT, HERE'S THE LOWDOWN ON THE DIRECT-TO-DVD "DUKES OF HAZZARD" PREQUEL YOU WERE SO WORRIED ABOUT.
EMPEROR LUCAS WANTS SEAN CONNERY FOR "INDY 4"....WHATEVER LUUUUUUUCAS WANTS.....LUUUUUUCAS GEEEETS....
TIM BURTON TO DIRECT FILM VERSION OF "SWEENEY TODD", FORGET ABOUT JIM CARREY.
JANET JACKSON, ONE OF THE LESS-CRAZY JACKSONS, HAS A NEW ALBUM COMING OUT IN SEPTEMBER. HOWEVER, IF IT DOESN'T HAVE A SEQUEL TO "BLACK CAT" ON IT, OR ANOTHER NIPPLE-SLIP, WE'RE NOT SURE WE CARE.
DANNY ELFMAN TAKES HIS NAME OFF OF "NACHO LIBRE", CONTINUES FIGHTING WITH EVERY DIRECTOR HE WORKS WITH.
CRAZY-PYSCHO-IDIOT ANN COULTER TO SQUARE OFF WITH OUT-OF-DATE, STILL MILDLY ENTERTAINING FOUL-MOUTHED COMEDIAN GEORGE CARLIN ON THE "TONIGHT SHOW" WEDNESDAY, JUNE 14TH. SOMEWHERE JOHNNY CARSON IS CRYING. OH, AND KT TUNSTAL IS THE MUSICAL GUEST.
That's it. See, you haven't missed anything.
Get well soon, Big Ben. And where a F'N helmet.
-Constable Kreegal
Big Boss of The Sheep
posted by Constable Kreegal at 10:45 AM
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